Home brewing for me has come as a bit of a surprise. For years I had instilled in me the notion that homebrew was rocket-fuelled acid that tasted like drinking splashed-up tar from the underside of a Mack truck on a boiling summer day. The fire and general burning that went along with it were mere side-effects that got in the way of the intended outcome; getting hammered!
About 3 years ago, I was flushed with a couple hundred bucks that my wife had allowed me to use for whatever I pleased. I was at a loss. What could I spend my new-found fortune on? This opportunity came up so rarely that I had forgotten how to think about myself…. Ha-ha even I didn’t buy that one! I was piss-farting about on YouTube one day and came across a Canadian fella drinking homebrew. It made me thirsty. I noticed his next vid was him actually brewing the stuff and he was using the Coopers kit that I was used to walking past in Kmart and BigW. My interest was piqued. He just seems to chuck the stuff in, mix it up and Bob’s your Uncle. This is kind of true, but there is a lot more to it and when armed with a few fundamentals, you can be brewing beer that not only represents great value for money, but it can really taste good too.
I personally choose to focus on ‘Kit and Kilo’ brewing. This term comes from the concept of a tin of goo (the extract base) and a kilo of sugar. This will get you standard results, but with a little tweaking here and there, the results can be great.
I have deliberately chosen to focus on the Cooper's products in this article as they are readily available and are put together for easy use and the results are consistent. Should you develop your skills and get hooked (I know you will), head onto the other brands and things out there at your local brew shop.
The Goo
This thick, sticky mess is what forms the base of the beer. Some lighter, some darker, some sweeter, more bitter etc. It just depends on what you’re after. The Coopers tins are great because they’re easy to come by and can usually get them quite fresh, with a long use by date. The fresher the better. This goo is the culmination of grain, hops, malt etc. being boiled down to form the sticky mess that is in the can. It gives us our flavour base. These are pre-hopped for bitterness, but with minimal aroma. I’ll touch on dry-hopping in the tweaks section.
The Sugar
A kilo of Sugar is needed to provide enough food for the yeast to chew through during fermentation. Plain white table sugar will work, but it won’t taste very good. It’ll taste cidery and acidic and have the mouth-feel of a glass of aspro-clear. I recommend using a combination of sugars. These are simply found as Brew Enhancers. Coopers BE1 contains dextrose and maltodextrin. These sugars enhance mouth feel and head-retentio and are a little more suited to lighter beers, like the lager and corona-type things. I prefer to use their BE2 enhancer. It has the same as BE1 but with the addition of Light Dry Malt to further improve body and head retention but more so to add more malty characteristics to the beer. Overall, these can be messed with, up and down with quantities, ratios etc., but the kilo mark is what you should aim for and the enhancers work really well to help with the results.
The Water
The KnK formula generally needs around 20-23 litres of water to make the batch. Really, just follow the instructions from Coopers (or whichever brand you use) for the actual standard assembly. Filtered water will probably get you the best results, but unless your tap stuff resembles the finished beer, then I'd just use that.
The Yeast
The yeast is what will chew up the sugar to form alcohol and ultimately carbonation in the final stages of the brewing process. There are numerous yeasts available but I find for the most part, the ones that Coopers provides in the tin work just fine. The important thing to remember here is temperature. If the water is too cold, then the Yeast won’t activate and too hot at temperature can kill the yeast, so you’ll end up with weird, beer flavoured water with no alcohol and let’s face it, we don’t want Corona.
Tricks and tweaks to take it from good to great
The Goo in the tin is available in many different styles, with a few brands out there being fairly accessible. Hell, even Coles and Woollies do their own. Once you’ve nailed the principles of knocking up a batch, check out the more upscale tins, like the Thomas Cooper Collection and the other fancy things like Munton's you can find at brew shops.
The sugars can be played around with to the point of being silly. No real right or wrong, but learn what each type will do for the beer and adjust from there. My personal favourite is to use BE2 and 500g of Light Dry malt to not only push up the mouth feel and malty goodness, but you’ll get a higher ABV% as well. Liquid malts are great and you can get wheat malt, amber, golden… all sorts. Play around with it. As long as you have at least a kilo of sugars then your yeast will do its job just fine.
Yeast can be messed with as well. You can get specific style-based yeasts, which rely heavily on correct temperature control so unless you’ve a cool room or fridge with the appropriate thermostat, I’d recommend to stick with the Coopers yeasts for now. They seem to be a lot more forgiving and will generally produce good results.
Different adjuncts can be added to tweak flavours and aromas etc. E.g.: Honey, herbs, fruit, jams… Just be careful here that your sugars balance out and if you’re using honey, try adding it at the later stage because if you add it at the boiling water point at the beginning, it can lose a lot of its flavour. One thing I have used a few times that adds great depth is golden syrup. Not too much or it may mess with the body, but 200g on top of the kilo has worked.
Hops
This is fun!! I’d not bother doing a boil or anything with hops as this is usually for bitterness and remember the tins of goo are already hopped so you don’t want to overdo it. Where it DOES get fun is in late addition and dry-hopping. The typical late addition is to buy some hops, either in premade ‘teabags’ or pellets, then soak them in boiling water for a bit then add to the mix prior to pitching the yeast. This will give you a little bitterness and a little aroma. My preferred method is to dry-hop. Now, I know this sounds like a weird sex-move that rabbits do, but I assure you it is a great way to get more aroma and flavour into the end result. This method is very very simple. A few days to a week before the end of fermentation, simply lift the lid briefly and throw the teabag into the tub. Let it sit and do its thing until bottling or kegging. This will add great aroma and surprisingly strong flavour to the beer. Experiment with different hop styles. I’ve included a link to a hop chart. Get to know the names and what they do and what they’re suited to. It is VERY valuable knowledge to have.
CLICK HERE for Hop Characteristics Chart
The thing I have left until last is arguably the most important of all. SANITATION
If you have got your recipe sorted, fresh tin, sugars, and extra hops and are ready to rock out a top batch, the last thing you want to do is have the whole thing spoiled by lazy or careless cleaning and sanitation. This applies to EVERYTHING that comes in contact with the beer ingredients. Tub, spoon, spigot, lids, bottling wands, bottles. Even bottle caps if you’re re-using the plastic ones. Follow manufacturer’s instructions. Avoid scrubby cloths and harsh abrasive soaps. Wash out with normal hot tap water and dish soap. Remove ALL traces of dirt, dust, oils, ANYTHING that may be lurking around. Bottles are best cleaned by a bit of bleach soaking and rinsing. Rinse completely clean with hot water and allow to air-dry a little. You can buy powdered sanitisers that you dilute in water and then have to re-rinse, but having done it this way, I can highly recommend to ditch it and buy a no-rinse sanitiser from the brew shop. This is still diluted into a spray bottle but as you just cover every spot with it, then leave it, it is a SHITLOAD easier. Especially in bottles. If you follow these steps and ensure you’re working in a safe and clean environment, there are no reasons you’ll end up with bad beer. Follow temperature instructions and it’ll ferment out cleanly.
A few little points
The fresher the goo, the better. Go for one with a long use by date and undented.
If the tin says ferment for a week before bottling, leave it for two. It’ll clear up better and taste cleaner with less floaties.
Once it is in the bottle, try (you’ll not be able to) to leave it for as long as you can before opening one. Ideally leave it at room temp in a dark place for at 2-3 weeks, then refrigerate it and don’t crack one until it has been in the fridge at least a week.
Sanitise. Sanitise. Sanitise.
Have fun with it. It is only beer after all.
 |
| A Fat Yak clone. |
I guarantee that once you have made you first successful batch, you’ll be hooked. Then you may understand why I get frustrated at the term ‘CRAFT’ beer. While it is definitely an art form, it is quite easy to get top results based on the fundamentals being followed. It ain’t rocket surgery.
I’ve included links to several resources that I have always found incredibly useful. Check them out and happy brewing. Oh yeh, you can drink it too and you’ll get drunk and stuff. J
Coopers DIY Beer
Recording in your own Asylum.
This edition is a bit of a 'how to' guide on recording your own record at home. Or more of a do and don't kind of thing.
I record music in a side life I run in parallel with my other life as a coffee roaster and my other life as a dad/husband etc. Like just about every musician I know that have 'other' lives. This is ok too as the life of a real muso isn't one any sane person should wish to aspire to. The stories are true from all I can gather and really. How much coke can you snort off the back of a hooker? Sorry. HookerS.
So you're well versed in the guitar and can write a tune? You're new to this whole thing and you got some decks? You got this killer beat in your head and you want to get it down? Well, if you’re reading this then I'm guessing you've got a computer and that being the case, you've got yourself a recording studio. Cheaper than you thought eh? And if you've got a Mac you’ve got the studio bundled in with the price of the machine. Ain't that a steal!
So the 1970's style recording studio may seem like a thing of the past (this discussion is for another edition as my studio business has evolved considerably shall we say, in the last 12 months or so) to the bedroom record producer. Why should you spend the money 'big' studios want to charge when you can get the same sort of results in the comfort of your own home? Your own bedroom! Close to your own well-stocked beer fridge.
Well here are a couple of reasons why, Chump and seriously, this is for the betterment of human society. So, read on……
I've stood by a standard statement in relation to making and recording music over the last 10 odd years. It goes like this:
'There is no right or wrong, but there is good and bad'.
Think about that for a minute. You can use that statement in most every aspect of day to day life. Another one closely related is:
'Just because you can, doesn't mean you should'.So the first question you should be asking, before you go and buy a mic and start writing the 2013 version of Sgt Peppers, is should you?
So often, writing and producing music by yourself is a dangerous road to travel. If you're doing it alone then chances are the only people who'll hear it during the production stage are your friends and, if you're lucky enough to have one, your girlfriend. These people won't tell you it sucks or give you any sort of critical feedback worth listening to. They want to support you and don't want to see your ego hurt. But I'm sure they're cringing listening to that ridiculous lyric and that terrible 80's string synth. They key here is to involve other people. Maybe even someone who knows a bit about music. This would be greatly beneficial to the whole process and make the thing move along in a more fluid and organic way. I say organic as recording music is a living, evolving exercise. No two records are the same and each one throws up a different set of challenges. While you’re involving other people in your record, leave your pretence at the bedroom door. You're not Thom Yorke so don't carry on like a spoilt little prick when someone who does know better, tells you for the good of the music (and my fucking ears) not to use that line or that lyric or that drum fill. Separate yourself and try to listen to what it is you're doing and ask yourself, is it Good or Bad?
When is enough, enough?
Back in the day, professional musicians recorded the records you grew up with (Though if you're under 22 or 23, this may not be true). These records were recorded to a behemoth tape machine hauling magnetic tape at a rapid rate of knots across a magnetised recording head. Archaic I know, but this is how it was. To make matters worse, the tape (depending on the speed the machine was set to) had a recording time of maybe 20 odd minutes. If you were lucky, the track count was 24 tracks max! We haven't even started to do 'punch-ins' yet. As for edits, grab me a scalpel and a splicing block.
What we take for granted now is the speed at which we can record our ideas and how quick we are to 'Command Z' our mistakes. We have the ability on computer based recording systems to audition a part over and over again until it’s absolutely 'perfect' and locked into a grid. So when is enough, enough? Have a firm sketch of what you want to hear. Write it down if you can. Draw it as a diagram if you can't write music. Make a language you can communicate with your fellow comrades in this record. (You have got other people involved haven't you?) When you think the thing is done, chances are it is. Know when to put things to bed. The worst thing modern recording systems have given us is sterility. The ability to de-humanise a song. Fuck that! I want to hear personality on a record. I want to hear imperfections. I want to hear the push and pull of a rhythm section. So, know when to call it a night and let the tune take on its own identity. Even if it is the ugly, redheaded stepchild of a tune that people want to drown. Ask yourself again, is it good or bad and then PUT THE FUCKING THING TO REST!
Shanna Watson
Another thing to consider is the actual process of recording. This is where having someone else (a recording engineer for example) can come in handy.
What do you know about mic selection and placement? What about phase relationship between multiple mics? Are you familiar with why, how and when to use a compressor? What about eq? Know what to do there? This point has to do which what your focus should be. I use the simply analogy and my own personal experience of designing a web site. I’ll put my hand up and say I have no idea when it comes to web design. No shame in that, but if I wanted to commit to learning the programs and protocols of web design, I'm sure I could come up with a site that would serve me quite adequately. But how much time would I have to spend learning these 'rules' of web design? Time spent learning a new process when I could spend time making music which I really want to do? That’s why I paid someone who knows what they're doing to do my web site. You should ask yourself; do you really want to spend time learning about the science of record making? It isn't hard for the most part but it doesn't just happen by magic. The people who've recorded your favourite records have spent hours learning and honing their craft. They didn't just turn a few knobs and tweak a few dials and then BAM, a hit record was made. It takes time, dedication and discipline to learn just the technical side of recording. Time that may be better spent actually honing your craft as a song writer, musician or producer. Making the actual tunes better. Remember……. Is it going to be Good or Bad??
These are just a few points but I think you get the drift.
Don't do it by yourself! INVOLVE OTHER PEOPLE!
And before you quote acts like Gotye, Tame Impala, Cody Chestnut, Wilco etc. as having done it themselves, no they didn't. At some point in the process someone, be it a producer, record company representative, fellow musician, another band, a Mastering Engineer, the list could go on, has had something to do with making it happen. And for the better I'd say. You wouldn’t trust a guy in a bedroom to perform a vasectomy would you? You'd seek out a professional. So why subject your ears (and mine) to the bedroom butcher.
